It comes as no surprise to me that Jessie Jackson used the N-word even after a public commitment to bring about the end of such usage among African Americans. It is such a part of black-speak that cleansing one’s internal lexicon of its presence is tough work. But it can be done, with time and support from others. It cannot be done without both of these elements and is why I am not surprised to hear the disturbing news about Rev. Jackson. Though I have great respect for him and other leaders of the 20th century civil rights movement, I realize he has spent most, if not all his lifetime living in a community where using the N-word is not only acceptable but common practice. I simply did not think riddance of this word would happen overnight and without occasional backsliding. IF, Rev. Jackson was sincere in his commitment - and I have no reason to believe he was not - it is unfortunate that responses to his backsliding cannot include examples of how he has been working with a support system to assist him in his efforts. At this point, we find ourselves yet again giving the same tired excuses and justifications. Enough!
My own change has not been instantaneous. During the late 80s while my military family lived abroad, I looked at my young beautiful children and decided not only would I not use that word but that it would not be used in my household, by anyone. It took lots of work and plenty of courage. I remember catching myself mid-utterance and the accompanying disappointment I had with myself. I remember telling African American friends who entered our home, “We don’t use that word here.” Often this left an uncomfortable shock and many times it offered an opportunity for wonderful dialogue amongst friends. Interestingly enough, I never had to tell any of my friends of other ethnicities not to use the N-word in my home or presence. With this broad approach coupled with consistency, humility in self-evaluation, and support, by the time of our return to the states in 1991, I was free of that demon. (more…)
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